The next one is a little surprising, and I think it applies more to some types of narcissists than others.
I would say especially the covert type of narcissist cares about being viewed as a bad person. If you paint the narcissist as a bad person, this is going to hit them pretty deep—because narcissists see things and people as all good or all bad.
If you’re starting to paint the picture that they are bad, and if any of that gets through, they become “all bad,” even in their own eyes. This is a very difficult place for a narcissist to be.
Just imagine if you can think back to any time when they saw you as all bad—and how vicious they were with you. Now imagine them feeling that themselves.
Along with that is going to come shame. Because if they’re all bad, if they see themselves as all bad, then there’s a whole lot of shame behind it.
Here there’s also a comment to reinforce that. It made me laugh a little bit at the end because of how blunt it was:
“Narcissists are very stupid…”
I don’t really like name-calling, but I think it’s the bluntness—and I think we all here can relate to what that person was feeling when they left that comment.
Seventh: Losing Control
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