Number two, they frequently cancel plans and disappear for days, and you don’t hear from them very often.
This is what happens when a person is cheating: they may go see someone else. They might call an escort, or they might be with “new supply.” They do all the things they shouldn’t—having sex, acting like the partner, treating that person like they’re the only one.
Meanwhile, their loyalty to you is gone—nowhere to be found. They do everything with the other person and forget about you, because in that moment, you don’t exist to them.
A narcissist can be predatory and parasitic. Whatever serves them in the moment is what exists for them. The moment it stops serving them, they discard it.
They don’t miss you. They don’t think about how you might be affected if you find out what they’ve done. How devastated you’d feel. None of that crosses their mind—because it’s all about the moment.
They love the experience, they’re in it, and then they completely discard you.
After days, they call or reappear again. With the repetition of the pattern, either they continue the cycle—or they make up stories to manipulate you, saying they got into an accident or that something bad happened, which is why they had to cut you off. They use these stories to avoid accountability and to escape the consequences of their actions—while enjoying “both worlds.”
3) They disregard their sexual health
Number three, they typically disregard their sexual health and claim they have no issues.
But you keep getting STIs and STDs because of their infidelity and cheating.
You get checked because you have symptoms. You test positive for certain STIs—and then when you try to confront them, they flip the story and blame you for cheating on them, claiming they were loyal to you while you weren’t.
They degrade and demoralize you to make you question yourself and your sanity. Then they use your STI as “evidence” to make you believe you cheated—when, in your right mind, you know you haven’t.
You’ve been loyal. You’ve been loyal to the relationship, to the marriage. You haven’t done anything you shouldn’t have—and it’s because of them.
But they twist it. They manipulate you into believing the STI is your fault—that you brought it into the marriage, and now they’re being affected.
I don’t know if you know about DARVO, but this is exactly it: Denying the attack and reversing the role of victim and offender.
They make it your doing, then attack you for it, and then victimize themselves—calling you the offender.
That’s the “mind-fuckery” and the crazy-making.
Did this happen to you? Drop your experience in the comments below so other people can feel validated.
4) Their sexual behavior may change suddenly
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