Now let’s get to the 14 things you can expect when you go no-contact with a narcissist. But first, let me introduce myself. My name is Christina, and I am a narcissistic abuse recovery coach. My mission is to help you recognize and overcome the effects of emotional abuse. And you’ll notice that this channel is dedicated to just that. So, if you like what you see, go ahead and subscribe.
The things we’re talking about here today don’t necessarily happen in any particular order, and most people do experience more than one thing we’re going to talk about. So definitely listen to the end if you want to be prepared for what happens when you go no-contact with a narcissist.
The first few things we’re going to talk about happen during the hoovering phase. If a narcissist wants to hoover you back after you’ve gone no-contact, you might expect something like an accidental text or a phone call. If you’ve ever gotten one, let me know in the comments.
This is when the narcissist will send a text that was apparently not for you—but “oops,” it was just a mistake. If you respond, they will use it as a foot in the door to start a conversation. It seems innocent enough, but if you’re not careful, before you know it, you can get swept up into all the drama again.
Now, as we do here, I want to highlight one of your comments because there are some real gems in the comment section.
This commenter says: “Just heard from mine after nine months of no-contact. I just got the accidental text. A few texts back and forth and he said he’s engaged. I won’t lie, it hurts him giving her everything he spoke to me about. I’m gone back into no-contact. Is that the right thing to do?”
So I’ll go ahead and answer that: Yes, it absolutely is the right thing to do. No-contact is not right for everyone in every situation. It’s a very personal choice, and sometimes your life may be so intertwined with the other person that it’s not even an option. So, no judgment on people who decide not to go no-contact. But if you can go no-contact, that is the best option.
And this is a good one to look at up front because there’s a lesson here. If that number had been blocked, this person would have never gotten that text. So that’s one thing—one area where you might be vulnerable. If you leave these lines of communication open, then you’re going to be open to communication.
In this case, for this comment, it wasn’t a hoovering attempt. It was an attempt to hurt this person—and it worked.
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