Number six, they brush off cheating stories as lies created by “haters” and jealous ex-partners.
When you catch them with proof—something undeniable, with evidence they can’t easily reject—they twist everything again.
They’ll say, “It was my ex. That crazy ex won’t leave me alone. She photoshopped this. I never did it. I’ve never been with that person. I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re making this up.”
They say you don’t believe them—because you’re “the same as them.”
And then they move you into a victimhood cycle. They cry. They act like they’re the horrible person. They say everyone is trying to hurt them.
“They don’t leave me alone. I don’t know where I should go. I don’t know where I should hide.”
They do this dramatic behavior to escape what they’ve done—the “crime” they committed—and to avoid accountability. As an empathetic person, you might fall for it once or twice. But they want you to gaslight yourself.
They want you to question what’s real. Maybe you start thinking, “Maybe they didn’t do anything.”
“Maybe their ex fabricated these lies.”
“Maybe there’s a conspiracy against them.”
“Maybe they’re not as bad as they seem.”
And then you self-gaslight because of their gaslighting.
They make you believe those stories are lies—lies created by “haters,” because in their perception, everyone is a hater.
According to their persecutory paranoia, they think everyone is attacking them—when in reality, they’re the ones attacking everyone they interact with.
So these are the signs—both obvious and not-so-obvious—that a narcissist may be cheating, and the way they escape accountability.
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