You can gaslight a partner. You can manipulate your children. And you can certainly rewrite your past to make yourself look like a saint. But there is one thing a narcissist cannot lie to: their own aging body. As they get older, the biological debt of their secret lifestyle starts to come due. The reckless behavior, the neglect, and the addictions they have hidden for decades are finally surfacing, and they are terrified.
To a narcissist, a doctor isn’t just a medical professional; they are a threat. Let me tell you why. A doctor is someone who has the power to see the rot beneath the surface. They keep hiding. They’ve spent a lifetime keeping away from people. So instead of being honest, what do they do when they visit a doctor in their old age? They blatantly lie. They lie about the substances they used to numb their loneliness. They lie about the secret flings that left them with infections. They even lie about their own minds failing them. They would rather die with their mask on than live with the truth exposed.
Today we are talking about the things they hope their medical chart never reveals: the five secrets that prove they’re not the perfect person they pretend to be.
Secret number one: They hide their STDs. The first secret is one of the most guarded because it shatters the image of the dignified elder. Many aging narcissists continue to lead reckless double lives well into their 60s, 70s, and beyond. They chase the high of the new supply through secret affairs or casual encounters, as you may already know, because it makes them feel young and powerful. However, they often do this without protection because, in their grandiosity, they believe they’re immune to the consequences that affect ordinary people. When they end up with a sexually transmitted disease, it represents a catastrophic failure of their mask. To admit to an STD is to admit to being dirty, impulsive, and, most importantly, human. They will sit in front of a doctor with symptoms and steer the conversation toward anything else. They would rather let an infection go untreated and risk permanent organ damage than have syphilis or HIV written on a chart where a nurse may see it.
They wave their body like a high-end luxury car. They want everyone to admire the paint job, but they are terrified for anyone to pop the hood and see that the engine is leaking oil from a life of reckless driving. They would rather suffer in silence than admit that their superior moral character was a lie. A doctor may argue with them because they have undeniable evidence; blood tests clearly display infections. What would the narcissist do? You may think, “Oh, this is irrefutable. They’ll have to accept it.” They don’t. They call the doctor crazy. They sometimes try to counter-gaslight the doctor into believing that these results are made up, as part of some sort of conspiracy.
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